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Are Women Better Lovers Than Men?
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This is a weird one. Over the course of my life, watching relationships in lots of different ways, and talking to hundreds if not thousands of people, men and women, about sex…I suspect the answer is “yes.” Meaning that if a woman decides she is going to screw a man’s brains out, when morning comes, he is indeed more likely to agree that his cranial matter was on the floor than in the reverse case. This isn’t a “women are better” argument, it just deals with one specific arena, and here is why I believe it might be true.
1) Simply put, men are simply put. We just aren’t as complicated sexually. I heard it said once that men are like balloons that you blow up until they explode. Women are like combination locks. The combination changes every day, and about half the women out there don’t even know their own combinations.
2) Women share intimate information with each other more readily. Can’t count the number of times women have told me about secrets of oral sex they learned from other women. Hell, one woman I know actually took her girl friend to a bar, picked up a guy, and they PRACTICED on him all night. I have never heard of guys doing this for each other. Have you?
3) Information about sexuality is more readily available woman-to-woman than man-to-man. Every time I go through a checkout line, whether at the grocery store, drug store, or 7-11, I’m assailed with women’s magazines featuring articles like “50 ways he wants you to touch him (but won’t admit)” “Thirty Bad-Girl Moves he’ll love you for!” And so forth. Men’s magazines pretty much top out at how to get a woman in bed, with a MUCH smaller proportion of what to do once you’re there.
4) #3 is empowered by a simple truth: women (in comparison to men) can pretty much get laid any time they want, if they drop their standards for commitment. “Men are the gas and women are the brakes” is an hysterical line from a movie I forget, and there is some truth there. I’ve had at least ten times as many women and men say something to the effect of “when I’m dressed up, and walk into a bar, I know I can have any man there.” Again, the difficulty isn’t getting a guy into bed…it is creating a relationship afterward. Freed from the constant, restless search for the next warm body, the ladies have brain cells freed up to ask a different question.
5) Reproductively, a woman’s orgasm doesn’t matter much. They get pregnant all the time, whether or not they enjoyed the process. On the other hand, (save for a bit of pre-ejaculate leaking), if the guy doesn’t see sparks, there’s no baby. This in and of itself makes a fascinating set of value hierarchies between men and women, a differential in what they consider important in relationships and bedtime that both powers and complicates human relationships painfully…and deliciously.
I see men and women as being two sides of the same critter, without a lot of difference twixt the two. But in this arena…yeah, I think the average woman is a better lover than the average man. I’m sure there are other reasons beside the ones I amused myself by listing, as well as counter-arguments. Now I’ll sit back and watch the fun.
What do you think? Do you agree with Steven’s arguments, or do you take a different stance?